Maria at Tough Cookie Mommy inspired me to write about this because of her post Just Friends. Go read her post and then come back and finish reading this one.
Have you ever heard yourself say or think any of these?
- She’s so pretty. Does my partner wish he were with her instead of me?
- Did you see that? She just touched his arm or brushed her breasts against him.
- Quit batting those lashes at him. He’s taken.
- Who wears that anyway? My partner doesn’t need to see your cleavage.
- He’s laughing on the phone with her. He doesn’t laugh like that when we talk on the phone.
- He dressed especially nice today. Is he trying to impress her?
- Cologne? What is he up to…
There are plenty more examples of suspicious thoughts that fill our minds and worry us, but you get the drift.
So, can men and women be just friends?
Or is someone in the relationship – either her or him – wishing for more?
Here’s my take…
Maria may be right and perhaps single ladies are flirting with my husband. Maybe those accidental touches, or the frequency of giggles and eyelash batting are a calculated attempt to seduce my husband.
I’m sure not every person is out to get him, but I agree that there are some for sure that think he’s a catch. After all, I think he’s handsome, funny, and a great dad – obviously other women see that too.
However, while I may look twice at someone else’s behavior or even at hubs, I remind myself that fundamentally, it doesn’t matter what someone else’s designs on my husband may be.
We are married.
Marriage or committed relationships (at least in my experience) are not the fairy tale we’ve been fed where everyone finds their soulmate and then live happily ever after.
Yes, you may find your soulmate, and you may live happily most of the time, but that isn’t the whole story.
Each and every day you make a concious decision to remain committed to this other person. Each and every day you put your trust and your faith in the other person to have your best interests at heart.
No one in a relationship can honestly say each and every day is blissful. And, would you really want it to be?
The hard times, the bad times, the struggles are the fire that forge and strengthen your relationship.
If you are never challenged or tested, I personally don’t think you can reach your full potential, nor can your marriage.
So, here’s a thought to ponder.
I welcome women to flirt with my husband.
I can just imagine the gasps and disbelief from some of you after that statement. But here’s why… (continued HERE)