Funny things kids say:  When do I get my period?

Funny things kids say: When do I get my period?

You would think with a title like that, that it says it all – right?

Nope.

Follow along if you dare on my conversation this weekend and flowing into Monday morning preparing for work.

I must set the stage by letting you know that my nine year old daughter desperately wants her ears pierced.  I told her years ago that she could get them pierced when she starts her period.  Hubs and I disagree on the outcome of this decree.  My reasoning?  I recall earrings as a rite of passage and wanted to correlate something positive to her menstruating.  Many women dread their period, or certainly tire of it before it ends, and I wanted her to look forward to “becoming a woman”.  My husband?  He thinks I’m sending her straight to therapy.

Sunday running errands

Jaeda: Every single girl in 3rd grade except for me has their ears pierced.  I counted.

Me: That’s nice.

Jaeda: It’s not fair that I’m the only one without my ears pierced.

Me: It’s not a fairness issue.  They have different parents.  You’re stuck with me.

Jaeda:  How old were you when you got your ears pierced?

Me: I think I was about 12.

Jaeda: That’s years away!

Jaeda: Did you get your ears pierced after begging for years and your mom telling you “No.”?

Me:  No, probably my cousin got her ears pierced so I wanted mine pierced.  Want to call grandma and ask her?

Grandma was called.  After Grandpa said they pierced my ears when I was born (ha, ha, Dad) Grandma confirmed I was 12 and likely it was because Karey had hers done.

Jaeda: Well, when am I going to get my period?

Me: Well at your physical last year the doctor said ball park is 18 months after breast buds start.

Jaeda:  Has it been 18 months?

Me:  No.  Sometime this summer is 18 months, but remember this is just a guide, not hard and fast rule.

Jaeda: This is so not fair.

This continued with much arm crossing, whining, and hormonal expressions of the unfairness of it all.  Puberty – what a joy!  (insert huge amount of sarcasm here)

Later Sunday Night

Jaeda:  Mom! (insert excited voice)  I’m growing hair, you know, there!

Me:  Really?

I was not shocked.  I have, after all, had over a year to get used to the idea.  Since her 8 year old well-child visit (EIGHT people) when the doctor confirmed she was “budding” and gave us the rule of thumb that in about 18 months she’d get her period.

Me:  See, it won’t be long till you get your period now.

Monday morning as I was putting my makeup on

Picture kids freshly woken up.  In their PJ’s, lounging over the arm of the couch watching me put makeup on in the hall mirror.

Jaeda: Isn’t it weird that I’m having puberty?

Me:  Not really, it’s natural and remember the doctor told us this was about the right time.

Jaeda:  I’m growing hair.  Is it weird to have hair?

Tevan (6 year old boy):  I’m growing lots of hair on  my legs.  When do I get my period?

Jaeda:  You’re a boy!  You don’t get a period.

Tevan:  That’s not fair!

Seriously.  They were fighting over who got to have a period or not!  After a minute of back and forth on this, Tevan, my curious logical one asked:

Tevan:  Do you get a hair cut for that hair?

Me (internal):  Seriously?  Where was this conversation in What to Expect When You’re Expecting!

Me (out loud):  Well, yes, I shave the  bikini line.

Then a voice from the balcony is heard…

Hubs:  Once a year!

*Just a note that he was joking!

11 Responses to Funny things kids say: When do I get my period?

  1. OMG! You SO made me laugh today. I thought I was going to pee myself. Even my husband came over to see what I was reading because I was laughing so loud. You crack me up girl and so do your kids!

    • I love it when I make people pee! :) But, seriously – where is the manual on how to answer THESE questions! And I so wish I had a video camera of the conversation because we totally would have won America’s Funniest. :)

  2. That is hilarious! Sounds like our house… except my girls don’t seem to even BEGIN that process until 13 around here. Fortunately, or my hubby would be having a coronary even earlier!

    I enjoyed getting a glimpse into your life… what a fantastic blog! Great job of letting reality slip through your typing, and funny, too! Love it!

    • Thank you so much! And welcome!! I can only hope my 3 year old daughter is closer to the 13 mark than 9. Unfortunately, my daughter comes by it honestly as her great-grandma was 9 when she started menstruating as well.

      I really don’t think hubs has any idea what he’s in for because the boys in Jaeda’s class are still 8 and 9 year old boys. Just wait till THEY start walking around with facial hair and oh my, the coronary will begin. :)

      Thank you very much for your compliments! I really appreciate them.

    • I know, right? She is pretty excited, so not sure if she would be embarrassed or not – but I can only imagine.

      My hubs and kids don’t really know about the blog. They DO, but I don’t bring it up much so I’m pretty sure they don’t read. For sure the kids don’t…not sure if hubs is lurking or not. :)

  3. This had me rolling.

    It’s funny how something like getting ears pierced can make you look forward to The Curse… if she only knew…

    My husband reads my blog, so I have to watch what I say… It can prove to be a challenge.

    We’re just starting to get into the Questioning Phase – it’s quite fascinating.

    But yeah, I don’t recall this topic in What to Expect…

    Great post!

    • I try not to put anything TOO personal here, but this was too darn funny to keep to myself. :)

      How old is yours? My 3 yo is constantly asking “why?”, but so far nothing too uncomfortable or of this nature yet!

      Oh the joys. I swear every day it is something new, but at least this time I left for work laughing.

      • My son turns four next week, and my daughter has only mastered about 10 words so far. :-)

        Our more “interesting” topics of discussion lately have been why his baby sister won’t grow a penis when she gets bigger and other basic “boy parts versus girl parts” assumptions he makes.

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