Follow along if you dare on my conversation this weekend and flowing into Monday morning preparing for work.
I must set the stage by letting you know that my nine year old daughter desperately wants her ears pierced. I told her years ago that she could get them pierced when she starts her period. Hubs and I disagree on the outcome of this decree. My reasoning? I recall earrings as a rite of passage and wanted to correlate something positive to her menstruating. Many women dread their period, or certainly tire of it before it ends, and I wanted her to look forward to “becoming a woman”. My husband? He thinks I’m sending her straight to therapy.
Sunday running errands
Jaeda: Every single girl in 3rd grade except for me has their ears pierced. I counted.
Me: That’s nice.
Jaeda: It’s not fair that I’m the only one without my ears pierced.
Me: It’s not a fairness issue. They have different parents. You’re stuck with me.
Jaeda: How old were you when you got your ears pierced?
Me: I think I was about 12.
Jaeda: That’s years away!
Jaeda: Did you get your ears pierced after begging for years and your mom telling you “No.”?
Me: No, probably my cousin got her ears pierced so I wanted mine pierced. Want to call grandma and ask her?
Grandma was called. After Grandpa said they pierced my ears when I was born (ha, ha, Dad) Grandma confirmed I was 12 and likely it was because Karey had hers done.
Jaeda: Well, when am I going to get my period?
Me: Well at your physical last year the doctor said ball park is 18 months after breast buds start.
Jaeda: Has it been 18 months?
Me: No. Sometime this summer is 18 months, but remember this is just a guide, not hard and fast rule.
Jaeda: This is so not fair.
This continued with much arm crossing, whining, and hormonal expressions of the unfairness of it all. Puberty – what a joy! (insert huge amount of sarcasm here)
Later Sunday Night
Jaeda: Mom! (insert excited voice) I’m growing hair, you know, there!
I was not shocked. I have, after all, had over a year to get used to the idea. Since her 8 year old well-child visit (EIGHT people) when the doctor confirmed she was “budding” and gave us the rule of thumb that in about 18 months she’d get her period.
Me: See, it won’t be long till you get your period now.
Monday morning as I was putting my makeup on
Picture kids freshly woken up. In their PJ’s, lounging over the arm of the couch watching me put makeup on in the hall mirror.
Jaeda: Isn’t it weird that I’m having puberty?
Me: Not really, it’s natural and remember the doctor told us this was about the right time.
Jaeda: I’m growing hair. Is it weird to have hair?
Jaeda: You’re a boy! You don’t get a period.
Tevan: That’s not fair!
Seriously. They were fighting over who got to have a period or not! After a minute of back and forth on this, Tevan, my curious logical one asked:
Tevan: Do you get a hair cut for that hair?
Me (internal): Seriously? Where was this conversation in What to Expect When You’re Expecting!
Me (out loud): Well, yes, I shave the bikini line.
Then a voice from the balcony is heard…
Hubs: Once a year!
*Just a note that he was joking!