Chores Wars – Negotiating a Peace Treaty

Chores Wars – Negotiating a Peace Treaty

Chores Wars:  The back and forth negotiating, eye rolling, foot stomping (both mine and theirs), and aggravating battle between parents and kids regarding doing chores without being hounded until the end of time.

The eye rolling and attitude regarding chores have subsided a bit in the past couple of weeks (ok, my eye rolling and attitude have subsided) and my neck is starting to emerge again as my shoulders gradually lower from their former position snug against my ears.   But while I feel a reprieve, I don’t think we’ve gotten to waving the white flag yet – nor even the white dust cloth.

While chores haven’t been a source of contention between me and the kids, I have a suspicion it’s more because they’ve spent the past few weekends at their Dad’s and therefore the issue hasn’t come up.  Rather than cycle back up to both of us being irritated, I decided to develop a system.  Plus I thought about how I was deciding what chores were appropriate for each age, equity between the kids, and reasoning behind the angst and decided a more deliberate approach would probably help.

Chores Wars Battle Plan

I’m going to develop a spreadsheet where the kids get to sign up for what they want, but I’m hoping you can help me fine tune it before I reveal it to the critics (aka my 5, 8 and 11 year old).   There are 3 sections so far:

  • Everyday chores expected from everyone.
  • Chores expected by age.
  • List of chores with ranking of Hard, Medium, or Easy. 

Everyday Chores

Everyone is expected to:

  • Clean their own bedroom
  • Pick up their things and put them where they belong.
  • Put their plates in the dishwasher.

Any others I’ve forgotten?

Chores by Age

Here’s my first go at what seems appropriate:

Age 5 to 7 2 Easy or 1 Medium
Age 8 to 10 1 Hard, 1 Medium, 1 Easy
Age 11 to 13 1 Hard, 2 Medium
Age 14 to out of house 2 Hard, 2 Medium

and if we run out of one category or the kids want to swap, I’ve come up with equivalents…

Equivalents (for swapping)
2 Easy = 1 Medium
3 Easy = 1 Hard
1 Med + 1 Easy = 1 Hard


Chores Listed and Ranked



  • Unload dishwasher
  • Load dishwasher
  • Clean bathroom (1x/week)
  • Wash pots and pans
  • Clean up dog poop (1x/week)
  • Do Laundry (including folding)
  • Cook dinner (2x/week)
  • Mow yard


  • Match socks (1x/week)
  • Take out trash (daily + all trash 1x/week)
  • Change cat litter (1x/week)
  • Mop (1x/week)
  • Sweep (3x/week)
  • Set table
  • Water flowers


  • Feed dog
  • Feed fish
  • Feed cat
  • Vacuum
  • Get drinks
  • Wipe down table
  • Wipe down counters
  • Get the mail

Feedback on My Chores Wars Battle Plan

What do you think?  Love it? Hate it?  Have suggestions for moving things around or chores I’ve forgotten to include?  How do you handle chores?

chores wars fight boxing kids


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